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    Thinking of divorce? Some things a Boca Raton divorce attorney wants you to consider

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    Boca Raton Divorce Lawyer Ronald Zakarin

    It might have been a quiet morning in Boca Raton when you had the talk. Maybe the sun was shining, birds were playing in the birdbath outside the picture window.  Or maybe tensions had been building for a while.  Arguments over the little things that never really seemed to matter, long silences, changes in behavior, your spouse out too late with his or her friends, all the time.

    Maybe there were the calls or texts that always seemed to be from “Nobody.”  Whatever it is, you have had the talk, or you are about to. This wasn’t spawned by quick tempers or in some kind of way to get your attention.  The matter has gotten very serious, very quickly.  Maybe there was infidelity?  Mental illness?  Or the relationship had just run its course.

    What do you do?

    It’s not an easy question, but the simple answer is: get an attorney!  However, there isn’t any particular answer for anyone without first looking into the circumstances surrounding the reason (if any) your spouse has filed for divorce.  First, take into account some of the basics.  Right now, your head might still be spinning, so break it down to the most important fundamentals you can focus on right now, and take them step by step.

    Is this an amicable parting of ways or is it going to get ugly?

    If this is a peaceful divorce and both of you are on board, you are one of the lucky ones.  There’s a great chance that if you have children, you will become effective co-parents.  Division of property, relationships with family and friends might not change all that much.

    However, if the answer isn’t so congenial, you are in for a long, and often difficult struggle.  In both cases, you should each retain legal counsel, since there is a lot of detail involved in the process, and amicable or not, this is likely something you haven’t prepared for and should rely on the advice of a professional Boca Raton divorce attorney.

    Do you have children together?

    If the answer is yes, throughout the entirety of your marriage, you have known how much work kids are.  You give up a lot and make sacrifices for your family.  From expenses to the time spent getting them to doctor appointments, to how time is spent with each side of the family during holidays, kids never fail to take whatever time you can give to them.  So much of your relationship has centered around the kids, however, the divorce isn’t any of their business and certainly none of their fault.

    Your relationship might have centered around the kids, but that is no reason to drag them into the divorce.  They are going to have enough on their plates to deal with.  Be prepared for some active grieving for the loss of their family either way.  Anger, depression, bargaining, out of character behaviors that are typical for what they are going through.

    It might be best to be proactive and discuss the situation with them with a counselor, and keep them out of the fight by all means.

    Every attack made against your soon-to-be former spouse affects them directly whether you believe this is true or not.

    Secure Your Environment

    How is this divorce going to affect you?  Do you have support systems in place?  A roof over your head?  Is your job going to be affected?  Are you currently in business with your soon-to-be former spouse?  If so, this will also be a matter up for litigation.  A Boca Raton divorce attorney can prepare you to safeguard your assets to make sure your spouse cannot liquidate your property during the divorce.

    Try to Make This Process as Painless as Possible

    During a divorce you might have a lot of factors in your life encouraging you to make this fight as taxing as possible.  It is best to keep in mind that with added conflict, including a courtroom trial, the cost of this divorce,–financially as well as emotionally–also goes up.  Everything you have built in your marriage is at risk for being lost when the cost of the battle exceeds your means.

    It becomes a war, which leaves everyone reeling and may take years or decades to recover.  A lot of divorce proceedings can be solved in Mediation without the expense of hearings and courtroom battles.

    Contact us to discuss your options with your attorney and get started right now on building a better life from here on out!